if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Randomize
