Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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