Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
