forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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