I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
