I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
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