I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
