Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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