i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Randomize
