Is it normal to miss your booty call?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
