I saw his package. It spoke to me.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
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Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
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I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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