Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
