Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize