New low: just hacked my moms facebook
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
