Texts From Last Night

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  (269): View more from Michigan

  I wanna bring you to show and tell

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  (269): I wanna bring you to show and tell http://tfl.nu/jv6d
  Replies (1) Good night (2113) Bad night (766)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...

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  (202): You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell... http://tfl.nu/oe10
  Replies (8) Good night (757) Bad night (1996)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty

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  (609): i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty http://tfl.nu/sjep
  Replies (6) Good night (2821) Bad night (707)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.

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  (256): we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it. http://tfl.nu/bdg5
  Replies (34) Good night (10832) Bad night (1576)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.

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  (847): At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face. http://tfl.nu/zq8n
  Replies (73) Good night (1324) Bad night (8177)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.

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  (309): i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night. http://tfl.nu/g32e
  Replies (44) Good night (1648) Bad night (3956)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.

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  (510): i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter. http://tfl.nu/xztf
  Replies (33) Good night (2106) Bad night (5648)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it

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  (818): The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it http://tfl.nu/3wsm
  Replies (5) Good night (1326) Bad night (2801)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.

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  (248): You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning. http://tfl.nu/57rh
  Replies (3) Good night (2689) Bad night (891)
• Favorite

  (424): View more from California

  Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?

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  (424): Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo? http://tfl.nu/93zn
  Replies (24) Good night (1265) Bad night (562)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.

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  (402): Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that. http://tfl.nu/hrua
  Replies (2) Good night (423) Bad night (673)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing

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  (203): this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing http://tfl.nu/0rfp
  Replies (5) Good night (662) Bad night (423)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests

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  (310): Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests http://tfl.nu/hq9w
  Replies (0) Good night (740) Bad night (463)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.

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  (505): I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single. http://tfl.nu/1f65
  Replies (10) Good night (1738) Bad night (620)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore

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  (603): The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore http://tfl.nu/4txe
  Replies (3) Good night (720) Bad night (316)

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