remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Randomize
