trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
