I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
