Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
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