i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
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