Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
