the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
