You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
