whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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