you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
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