Dual....:-)
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
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