butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
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We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
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In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag