hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick