i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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