is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Farmville is her only friend.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
These 25 Teachers Said Horrible Things to Their Students
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
21 Millennials Confess The Most Awkward Way Someone Has Tried Hitting On Them
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle