Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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