at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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