i may or may not be watching the land before time
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
