i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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