Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize