And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
