dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
