i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
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No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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