put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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