Yo dont text me then not text me
I just cut my nipple shaving
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
you didnt know i had herpes?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize
