I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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