your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
