i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
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