went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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