Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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