i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
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