okay pat passed out under dana's car
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize