Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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