I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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