I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
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