no, he came in my armpit
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
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